bluecrazi_angel

1 Week away :)

2009-12-17T15:49:52Z

So one week from today it will be Christmas Eve once again. YAY! I'm actually excited about this year, it could have something to do with the fact that I actually have a job this year. Or it could do with the fact that I got into the spirit a lot sooner. PUtting up the Christmas tree after Thanksgiving and purchasing my first Christmas presents around the same time. Last weekend I (for the most part) finished up my shopping and only had to stress about two things... 1. My dad's DVD's to come in before Christmas and 2. Trying to figure out when I would have time to mail out my brother's family's stuff. My mom helpped out with 2 and 1 just arrived last night (but I noticed it this morning).

This year with a new Niece and the "Monarchs" of the family having passed I've been thinking a lot about Christmas's past. Like how I believe my favorite ones were mostly spent in California. Passing out on the couch and waking up with stuff set neatly in front of the fire place. And wondering how you could have been sleeping so soundly and not have heard the bells of Santa's clothing as he came down the chemny. My most memorable Christmas takes place in California and while I can't recall the age that I was at the time I can pick up the details. My mom called ALL us kids out (about 4 of us at the time) to hurry and come out side. We raced out and her and my dad and uncle pointed up at the sky. There was something traveling rather fast in the twilight sky changing every color and mixing that you could think of. It was beautiful. From the size and lenght it was there was only one thing it could be. Santa Claus. Well you've never seen 4 kids go to bed faster then us that night. And yes I do know what an air plane looks like and this wasn't an airplane. Holiday tradtions in California were always fun. Sitting around in a HUGE circule and taking turns opending presents, took a few hours. Then crowd around the stove as Grandma made breakfast (fried dough with sugar) YUMMMY!

Even though the Holiday's bring stress in the end it's all worth it. I'm excited for this year to sit around and eat and drink and hang out with family and friends.

Something I"m excited about is being able to go to California in January and go to Disneyland and being able to see my cousins for something happy and fun.

Sweet and Salty

2009-11-18T04:46:29Z

So first of all I'm tired of people miss-pronouncing my name. I don't care how you think it's suppose to be said it's wrong. When I correct you the first time don't be a smart ass and keep saying that AFTER 27 FUCKING YEARS THAT I HAVE BEEN PRONOUNCING MY OWN FUCKING NAME WRONG. I finally had enough of it today and told the Driver who keeps calling me by the wrong day, half a joke ONLY to him and half serious. I told him that I if he Pronouces my name incorrectly one more time that I will stab him. I got a small smile as I watch the look on his face go from smiling to "OH GOD!" and the looks of horror when he asked if I was serious and I said yes. He didn't say anything further as he walked away. But I made sure that he was aware that no one would believe him that I would be able to do such a thing. As silly of a thing of saying someone's name incorrectly can be I just had enough. IT"S EVERY FRUCKING DAY!!!!

Something good... I looked at the calender today and realized that on my next paycheck I will be able to purchase my plane ticket to Georgia for January. I wasn't sure if I would be able to go but now I am sure. I'm excited because I"ve been wanting this trip more than anything. I've been wanting to escape Arizona for over a year now and since I got let go from Timberlake and started at Shamrock I haven't been able to. The only trips I've taken have been out of town for two funerals and for a small 2 day trip with my parents to San Fran...OH and 1 trip to New Mexico for a game. I need to get away soooo bad that I could scream. I wanted to go to Georgia for my birthday but didn't have the money. I want to go to Georgia to just be able to hold my Niece for just a few minutes. If all I had was just 5mins I would be happy. I miss my brother and would like to see him where we're both smiling and not crying. In January I can do both. After the new year I get 15days vacation. I'm so excited. I can finally take a vacation after a year of not going anywhere.

I am also thinking about getting a ticket to go see the Nutcracker this year... If anyone wants to go let me know.

bluecrazi_angel @ 2009-10-27T22:59:00

2009-10-28T06:06:32Z

So a few things...
1. I hate my LOGIC Teacher.
2. I've recieved my tags within a week after redoing them.
3. Reached 10 people for the walk and still collecting money. I hope we can reach our new goal.
4. I won a gift card at work :)

Walking for my Grandparents...

2009-10-22T03:13:08Z

November 14th, is the Memory walk for Phoenix. Please join or donate money to a cause that's awesome. It is a 5k, so roughly 3miles.

memorywalk2009.kintera.org/faf/search/searchTeamPart.asp

Boondock Saints 2

2009-09-20T22:50:15Z

A co-worker of mine told me that there was a new movie coming out with all of our favorite cast members from the first film. Didn't realize that it would be out so soon. YAY..

Dorian Gray Movie

2009-09-18T05:24:50Z

Searching around on Apple Trailers like I sometimes do I came across this movie trailer for a Dorian Gray movie. The trailer looks pretty awesome and I really want to see it. So far I can only see that it's coming out in Canada and there's no (as of yet) US release date... So I'm hoping it comes out this way soon...

bluecrazi_angel @ 2009-09-05T21:42:00

2009-09-06T05:05:19Z

I think i'm going to go crazy soon. Whenever something positive or semi-postive happen something EXTREMLY negative happens. The latest in a LONG list of stuff is that my cell phone went for a swim. It fell out of my pocket into water. The battery got wet the inside of the phone got wet. I'm trying to dry it out but I don't know if it will work or not. The sucky part is that I'm really not due for an upgrade until December... I'm hoping against hope that my phone will turn back on soon.

But with the way things have been going is that it will but something bad will happen. It's been one thing after another and I feel like I'm loosing the small amount of grip that I have on my sanity.

If anyone has a OLD verizone phone that they aren't currently using that's in good working order and wouldn't mind me borrowing it for a few months, if my phone doesn't work. Can you please let me know? Thanks...

bluecrazi_angel @ 2009-08-21T23:35:00

2009-08-22T06:38:34Z

Something slightly good about today... After finding out that one of my books went up in price on Amazon.com... I found it on the used list on Amazon for 15 dollars cheaper then what I originally found it for. Now the only down side is that it's going to be close to two weeks until I get the book. I'm hoping I can work something out with my professor.

Just because...

2009-08-09T01:07:07Z

Stuff about school and Other Stuff...

2009-08-06T15:21:42Z

Okay so I'm all set, mostly, for school to start. I'm motivated to finally complete English 102 and get a good passing grade. Yes I know it's a Freshman level class and that I should have already complete it. I hate research papers...I hate writing them and doing the leg work. Its one of the few things that I blame my mother for. And it's one of the few things she'll agree that I'm right about... So there's that... I'm hoping to fine my old English writing books. I'm hoping that even though the books change every two years that the books for English haven't so that saves me a little money. My parents are super excited and have offered to help but I don't want to take more money unless I really need to.

Work is a pain in my ass... My boss seems to give me a reason every day to wonder why I haven't looked for something new. I'm hoping that in January I can put in a transfer to a different department and have a more 8-5 job. Which would make me happier. But 10-630 isn't as bad as one might think. We'll see. Or maybe I'll just fine something i like better. We'll see.

In just random stuff and reading... I've been reading the Twilight series. So to begin I watched Twilight back in June and thought it wasn't as bad as I thought it might be. And actually enjoyed it. So one Saturday I decided I wanted to start reading them. While the first book has a LOT more than the movie does, I like the movie better, book felt to choppy. The second and third book so far have flowed a lot better and I'm looking forward to the movies. I haven't gotten to the fourth book yet, maybe this weekend, but I'm hoping it doesn't let me down and end on a odd note.

On a personal note... Aparently GG has discovered that she can spit and make noise with her mouth and at 4 months old she's getting ready to crawl and is doing the "worm" across the floor already. She's soooo cute.

Well that's it... Nothing new to report.

Concert...

2009-06-03T15:03:50Z

Fall Frenzy tickets are going on sale Friday and I want to go SOOOOO bad. Rob Thomas, Jason Mraz, The B-52's, Gavin Rossdale and Colbie Caillat are playing. Want to go... It's September 18th so I have time to save up for tickets. I'm just hoping that they don't get sold out before I can pick up a couple. If I can manged to swing it and go I'm also thinking about taking that day off of work, the 18th falls on a Friday.
If it comes down to it I can always try to win tickets.

Birthday Weekend...

2009-05-25T18:14:18Z

In true birthday tradition I took an extended weekend off from work. YAY!!! Friday I picked up gideonswake up from work and had a ummmmy tasty lunch at In and Out. After taking Gideon to the doctor we went and had fun with two movies. Both were amazing awesome. Night at the Museum 2 and Angels and Demons. Somewhere in between we got a bit to eat.

Saturday was lunch out with the parents for the birthday dinner. Chose a Brazilian all you can eat Steak house... Oh GOD!!! So tastly!!! Decided to get dress up and wear a really pretty dress that I hadn't worn before. We made a quick stop at Old Navy and gideonswake realized that I was having a malfunction with my outfit and procedded to walk behind me to keep me cover. And then made a special trip to Target to help fix the issues and bought me a new sweeter. It made me feel better and I was able to enjoy dinner. Oh so much food. We sat there for about 3 hours eating and drinking. It was the first time Gideon and my self showed affection in front of them which was nice to be able to do.
The rest of Saturday was spent lazying around watching movies at Gideon's appartment and then a small shopping adventrue. Got my flip flops I've been wanting for Months now.

Yesterday was much with the fun for saracate 's birthday pool party. Had a blast swimming and hanging out with people. Manged to pull Gideon away after a while so that we could head out to see Star Trek. OMGITOTALLYLOVETHATMOVIESOMUCHWITHTHEAWESEOME!!!!!

So I quiet enjoyed my birthday weekend. Today's a day of laundry (or at least do a load or two) and maybe going to get the car washed. Poor car. It needes a bath.

Thank you gideonswake for my amazing weekend and wonderful birthday. For the sweater (and keeping my back covered). For the movie I've been wainting for YEARS that you bought me. For the movies that we went to go see. I love you.

the voice of Mickey Mouse.

2009-05-20T15:27:36Z

I saw this on a friends journal and thought it should be shared. Wayne Allowine was Mickey Mouse since 1977. His wife does the voice of Minnie Mouse.

Request...

2009-05-18T16:17:09Z

If anyone who's out and around this week see the VFW selling Poppy Seeds. Can you please pick me up a few? I will be SOOOOO thankful. :)
Or let me know where I can pick up a few. :)

Water....

2009-05-17T00:16:00Z

Came home last night to fine my floor to my closet wet... HUmmmm...? This morning it's still very much wet but it's to wet to just have been a glass of water spilling. Told the other Amazon about it when we when we were out and about. Came home... The WHOLE closet floor is soaked and so is the area around my night stand/ bed where the tolite sits on the other wall. NOt only that but it spreads out to the length of the closet it self. AND I found the toliet dripping... So Amazon discovered that the whole area around the toliet (even more so at the pips) was completely ruined.

And in all of this I've slipped twice landing on my already hurt knee (that WAS almost healing). And took some of the skin off of one of my toes. Yep the world is DEFFINETLY ending in a few days.

Maybe dinner will be better and then Changeling. We shall see....

Ouchies...

2009-05-13T15:34:50Z

Okay this is me swearing that if my knee doesn't improve in one week I will make an appointment to go see Doc L. The ugly purple/red spot slightly above my knee is fading now, which is good. And the bruise below the knee is fading and almost gone.

I'm hoping today at work goes slightly better than yesterday. Having to train people who don't want to be there or think your Job is the joke is a pain in the ass. Also a co-worker leaving sick early doesn't help, which is cool... But having to close with the SLOWEST PERSON!!! *Pulls hair out*

Today holds promise... Specially when waking up in gideonswake 's arms.

Coming up Next on this Week...

2009-05-05T04:38:02Z

So finalizing plans for California. On Sunday I convince my parents to have us drive my car instead of my mom's, due to there being slightly more back seat room and I can drive it. What was unsure was if there will be a fourth person driving with us.

Today I got a phone call from my mom telling me that my brother is flying in on Wed and that I needed to pick him up before heading to their house. ... Umm.... I love my brother and all... But what was he thinking flying in here and then driving 6 hours to California and then 6 hours back? Right now it looks like we'll leave early morning Thursday and we'll be back on Friday night at some point.

I'm really happy that if nothing else I'll be able to come back on Saturday. I'm hoping that if something happens that I'll be back at least part of Saturday to be able to spend at least some time if not all day with gideonswake .

As much as I love going to California... Kind of wish it could be for something happy.

Check this out...

2009-05-02T06:32:35Z

This is something that really makes me smile after reading.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/05/01/assignment_america/main4984493.shtml

Just stuff...

2009-04-24T06:38:18Z

So... I totally want a Do over week. Not next week just this week. I suppose it's not all that bad. It's moved on rather quickly as it came and now it's the weekend. With Gideon.... He makes this week so much better by just holding my hand, touching my cheek, holding me close. I think I would have broken down harder if I didn't have his support of just being there.

Things haven't improved with my Grandma any. And they wont. Yesterday I was there when the Hospis nurse came to check on her. She had no blood presure. (You can still be alive without it.) Her heart is just pumping to hard for and fighting off the infection that's set in her legs. She's had bad circulation, since I can remember. She's stubborn that's for sure and is holding on. Part of me thinks she's holding on for us grandkids and the other parts is maybe she's just waiting for someone. While she's not all present majority of the time, there are moments of clarity.

Yesterday she kept saying "Thank you for coming" and "I love you". Today she smiled at me twice when I first arrived and said "I love you" twice and "Pray with me." So I held her hands and recited the "Our Father" and "Hail Mary."

On May 7th it'll be One years since we lost my Grandpa (her husban)... Right now that's two weeks apart. IT makes me smile to think that he left first so that she wouldn't be alone right now. I know he's around. I know he's been the one checking in on me the last two nights while I've been with Gideon. And I know he's with her now...

I went and saw her tonight before dinner with Gideon. She was asleep, going in and out. I gave her a kiss and said good night.... Tonight is the longest I've been home in the last few days. I've been staying with Gideon then coming home, showering and leaving again. Decided to put something into some order. Room is clean and somewhat organized. Everything has a place and Everything in it's place.

So for at the time being I'm okay... Even though the storm hasn't let loose yet, I've still got the shelter above my head to keep me dry and warm. And I'm so thankful for that.

Trying to say Goodbye...

2009-04-22T04:26:15Z

Today at work my dad told me to call him. I told him I had to wait until it reached a slow moment. Instead My cousin Lynn called me wanting to know the street she had to turn to my grandma's group home. I knew once she called that something bad was up. Called my dad. Hospiss has informed us that my grandmother is comfortable but is not eating or taking in any fluids.

... I don't think I'll have a grandmother in a few days.

And all i can think about is that little voice in the back of my head telling me for weeks to go visit her. To bring her a milk shake and sit and visit. Even though she doesn't know i'm there or who I am. And every time I would tell my self next week I'll go. But I didn't. I also can't help but think about how when I see her like she is I can't help but notice how she's not the grandma I grew up with. I've realized to that in 30+ years I'll have to watch this all over again with my parents.

The funny thing... Before things got really bad with my grandparents, forcing us to move them here... I never thought they would die or leave. The same with my Aunt Helen.

Just thoughts I needed to get out... Leave a comment if you like. But what would mean more is a tight Hug the next time you see me and a Smile.

today is brought to you by the letters F and U...

2009-04-21T05:17:25Z

So I manged to have a crying break down today after over 8 hours of work. Once I sat into my car and was able to breath fresh Phoenix air I finally released all the tenison I had been holding in for a big chunk of the day. Then on and off for the ride home.

Today was just one of those days that I should have just stayed in bed. One co-work off for two days of vacation and visiting with her mom. So that left us with just two and a half today. Lacey is half since she's not really in my department anymore but more like helps out. Mike I don't know what the hell he did today. But it wasn't really work. LUCKLY all the credit stuff got done. But There is more stuff left over. Mostly due to the fact that Mike was crappy and PMSing and showed us. I think Majority of everything would have gotten done if I didn't feel like it was just Lacy and I.

Tomorrow I'm going into work early and hopefuly getting stuff taken care off before it gets to crazy. I really don't think I can handle another day like today.

love those pets...

2009-04-18T15:28:59Z

bluecrazi_angel @ 2009-04-12T15:44:00

2009-04-12T22:46:09Z

I just found out from one of my friends serving in Iraq currently. That the base that was bombed with the 5 soldiers killed was her base! I"m just glade her and her husband are alright.

Careless Whisper- Seether cover

2009-04-08T03:09:46Z

So I heard this on the radio and felt it was share worthy. Seether's new single...

bluecrazi_angel @ 2009-04-01T23:31:00

2009-04-02T06:37:07Z

I love picking up a new book and the first few sentences draws me in. *La Sigh*